Stupid me. I was all set at the beginning of this week to play my first solo piece at a flute workshop this Saturday, and felt pretty confident. It felt like it wasn't perfect, but I had rehearsed my brains out and thought I was in pretty good shape. Working with my flute teacher, who's a DIVA, BTW, quickly changed my mind!
She inspired me by thinking of this short, seemingly simple piece called "Andante" by Ernesto Koehler, as "a little bouquet of daisies that I will present to the audience." Picture this: Blinking eyes and complete silence. What? "Be mindful of the phrasing that's involved." Boom....back to square one...and wow, was she right. I just sounded so awful.
After starting my 7th year with my dear teacher, I am beginning to understand. I really am in an ascending level of "Maslow's Pyramid". Just as I've been in the process of learning to oil paint, for the past 7 years, after exclusively painting with watercolors for 25 years prior to that...I'm learning to run with the big dogs...no, this is huge.
At this age, I am keenly aware of integrity. This is such a magic word. As my friend, and fellow watercolorist, Bill Childs, once said to me; "Don't ever sacrifice the integrity of the medium for gimmicks. There's no substitue for a solid painting." So, I'm hoping that as a beginning intermediate flute player and oil painter, I can be bound by integrity. My piece sounds so much better even 3 days before the performance. I will sound even better than today, 1 day before the workshop. It's okay if it sounds almost perfect 1 day after the workshop, and I have learned so much about my own limitations. It's so much fun to be "in process".